My personal blog. I post/reblog whatever takes my fancy. I seem to have developed a theme of posting generally tasteful stuff from Pixiv, but watch out for some weird shit.
What I do want to tell you is that you need to stop using the “wives, sisters, daughters” argument when you are talking to people defending the Steubenville rapists. Or any rapists. Or anyone who commits any kind of crime, violent or otherwise, against a woman.
In case you’re unfamiliar with this line of rhetoric, it’s the one that goes like this:
You should stop defending the rapists and start caring about the victim. Imagine if she was your sister, or your daughter, or your wife. Imagine how badly you would feel if this happened to a woman that you cared about.
Framing the issue this way for rape apologists can seem useful. I totally get that. It feels like you’re humanizing the victim and making the event more relatable, more sympathetic to the person you’re arguing with.
You know what, though? Saying these things is not helpful; in fact, it’s not even helping to humanize the victim. What you are actually doing is perpetuating rape culture by advancing the idea that a woman is only valuable in so much as she is loved or valued by a man.
The Steubenville rape victim was certainly someone’s daughter. She may have been someone’s sister. Someday she might even be someone’s wife. But these are not the reasons why raping her was wrong. This rape, and any rape, was wrong because women are people. Women are people, rape is wrong, and no one should ever be raped. End of story.
YESS!!! THANK YOU!!!!
I’ve always hated this “what if this was your DAUGHTER!?1?1/1” bullshit, but I’ve never been able to put it into such good words this way. A woman is a human being, even if she has no friends or relatives to speak of! Whether or not she’s somebody’s daughter isn’t really an issue, and the fact that it needs to be mentioned before someone will even show a fraction of a percent of empathy PROVES what a rape culture we live in.
Okay, I’d like to say that this is completely false. The “wives, sisters, daughters” argument is an attempt to provide an easy way for someone to relate the victim to someone the opponent knows in real life. Obviously, the victim in this case was in fact a woman, so it makes sense to make such a comparison. It says, “Hey, look, the victim is a person just like anyone else. It could have been a woman you know and love. This should piss you off just as much as if she were.” It is an attempt to bring the victim from a state of being some entity unrelated to a virtual state of being within the person’s familial group, where his/her protective instincts are strongest. NO WHERE is it claimed that “rape is wrong only if a man knows the girl.” No, it isn’t implied either. The argument itself only makes a possible reference to the sex of the person on the receiving end of the argument at the “wives” part (which, surprise, a women can be one), but sisters and daughters are things that men and women can share in common. It sounds an awful lot like you’re assuming that rape apologists are ALL men and rape victims are ALL women.
Personally, I would not make such an argument because it’s rather weak at convincing these types of people, but “perpetuating rape culture”? Really? How? Your argument has no coherency and only serves as another pointless insertion of “LOOK LOOK RAPE CULTURE”. I do agree, however, that it is incredibly fucking sad that there are people that don’t feel empathy for this poor girl, and I do agree that it shows something wrong with our culture. The point is that if you throw the term “rape culture” around every five seconds it loses quite a lot of validity.
In the end, all you did was say “rape is wrong because women are people.” Even when I agree with you that rape is always wrong everywhere and women are indeed people, I have to say this argument is incredibly void of any substance considering that the original “wives, etc” argument does not imply the contrary. You are exactly right when you say that it’s not what makes rape wrong, but that isn’t the point being made.
The Steubenville rapists are the complete scum of the Earth, but lets not get over zealous with feminist theory here.